Trying is NEVER GOOD ENOUGH

I've tried my best to give what I could never give before yet what I get back in return is frustration vent on me~ I tried my best to endure what I couldn't endure before yet it was never good enough for you! I tried...really I tried. I tried to change, I tried to make things work, I tried not to do things to hurt you over and over again! I tried. Sometimes I really wish to hide away and cry my eyes out because of the pain. I never once regretted being with you, I never once regretted trying to change for you...I never once regret anything with you! But what do I get from all these hard effort I tried to put in? I tried to go to work promptly everyday without fail, but still I wasn't good enough because I kept job hopping. I tried my best to keep a job but I always fail. I tried. I really tried. Can you give me a chance to prove? Please I beg of you. I'm trying...

I get jealous too; seeing you closer to my brother and his girlfriend compared to me. Even if they were just friends...the way you treat them and the way you treat me. I tried to understand, I tried to give in, I tried to be reasonable but I ALWAYS FAIL :( Am I so useless? I don't know...I just wanna break down and cry soon!!