This tangled lines of communication!

Endless arguments due to miscommunication,

reason being there's a difference in upbringing~

******

After reading through "Cupid's wild arrows", I was able to comprehend what I'm going through and have a better understanding towards this relationship between Baby and I. All these while, I realize that I was unable to comprehend Singaporean's thinking even though I was a Singaporean myself. I don't wish to make the most unsightly argument online with him either as it seems so uncivilized and I don't wish to make any disturbance to his normal lifestyle as I would be really selfish. I noticed that I had a language barrier with Baby, as I was brought up in a different way; not in such a sense of Chinese intellectual and conservative thinking but in a more American upbringing. With my Mandarin being my worst Mother Tongue language and being unable to comprehend the meanings of most of the words he said, I tend to have miscommunication with him that would eventually lead to a heated argument. Like I've always emphasized that I was the ignitor towards every arguments and quarrels. Yes I'm pretty much insensible to his situation and I admit that he would occasionally fail to comprehend what I have to say due to the standards of English-speaking vocabularies and grammars but he is improving tremendously which I'm really proud of.

I never blamed you for leaving me alone, I never blamed you for anything; maybe it's because of the distance between us that is actually creating the disturbance such as doubts and trust issues. Sometimes I'm really insensible, cranky and ridiculously selfish against his wish, which is absurd as that's not suppose to be the way in a relationship. I should be carefree towards his thoughts, I should comprehend the things he says and do at times and I know he didn't mean to upset me with them. His jokes with his friends is something that bonds them together yet I was unable to comprehend their jokes; I find it absurd, childish and sometimes ridiculous. (I'm sorry baby but I didn't mean to ridicule you or offend you). I just wish to speak my heart out and comprehend the differences between us. After staying abroad for so long and being brought up in the most civilized yet American way, I guess there's a big cultural gap between us and a huge language barrier...therefore we should work hard for our future and we should learn more about each other.

P.S - I love you very much. Because you mean so much to me...Ong Jian Zhen.